One moment
by phoenix-tears-uk
Summary: An angsty one-shot with a dollop of whumpage.


He had hesitated for a second too long, and the moment of indecision had cost him dearly. He should have known what was about to happen. He _had_ known. He had seen the signs, had read them correctly. He had seen the unease on the man's face, the twitch of his hand. Damn it, they had all seen gun. He had had plenty of time to move.

_Then why didn't you?_ Shawn asked himself. He lay sprawled in the dirt, his ears ringing from the gunshot. A cacophony of sounds reverberated in his head, some more distinct than others. There was definitely screaming. Of that, he could be certain. Was that Juliet? The noise was quite unlike anything he had ever heard from her before.

_Why would Juliet be screaming?_ Shawn thought, his mind foggy. _I should go see..._

Shawn shifted, attempting to raise himself from the mud. His hands clawed into the wet earth and his muscles shook with the effort, but his body would not respond.

_Huh_. Shawn thought, his mind drifting. _That's weird..._

Voices. He could definitely hear voices. Was that Lassie? Was he shouting? Shouting wasn't good. Why was everything so muddled? And why was he on the ground?

_I should get up._ Shawn thought, and he tried again. The cloying mud oozed through his fingers, but his body did not move.

That _was_ Lassie. Shawn was certain. And he sounded angry. Angrier than Shawn had ever heard him before. And that was saying something.

_Huh_, Shawn thought again. _I wonder what I've done now..._

But there were other voices too. Gus. He could definitely hear Gus. He was shouting too. But he didn't sound angry. He sounded scared. He sounded panicked. Why would Gus be panicked? And why was Juliet screaming?

_I want to get up,_ Shawn thought. _I need to know what's happening..._

He tried. He tried so hard to get up. But his body wasn't listening. He just seemed to sink further into the mud. His body felt so heavy, like it was no longer his own. And he was cold. And he hurt. This realisation came to him suddenly, and in the instance he realised it he could not understand how he could have noticed anything but the pain.

Shawn tried to scream. He _wanted_ to scream. He wanted to scream so loudly that all of the other noises would stop. Because he could take nothing more than the pain. He could not bear to hear Juliet screaming, or Lassiter shouting, or Gus's anguished cries. He wanted to scream until the world shared his pain with him, for how could anything continue when there was nothing but the searing agony that coursed through his body?

Shawn clawed at the ground again, the soft earth yielding to his touch, his face contorted as waves of pain obliterated any previous desire to rise.

_Help me_. Shawn thought. _Please. Make it stop._

His mind was closing in. He couldn't understand why no one was helping him. Why was Juliet screaming? Why was she not at his side? He needed her. He was dying. He was more certain of that than he had been of anything in his life. Surely it wasn't possible to hurt so much and go on living.

And Lassiter? Why was he shouting? Why wasn't he helping him? He needed Lassie. Shawn could feel himself begin to drift, and he did not fight it. Darkness was rapidly descending with the promise of respite from the terrible pain. Lassie would have made him fight it.

_I want to go home_. Shawn thought; a childish want. A desperate desire to escape his current situation. _I don't want to die_.

But he was so cold. And home seemed so very far away.

_Gus_. Gus was like home. Ever-present, always reassuring. So sensible and safe.

_I want Gus,_ Shawn thought.

His vision began to cloud. The noises faded. And so too did the pain. A small part of Shawn knew that he should be scared. The pain, whilst agonizing, was real. A link to the world. But the darkness was so calm. He could no longer hear Juliet screaming. And Lassie's shouts were diminished. And Gus... he could still hear Gus. But the previous panic had gone. He was talking softly, his voice soothingly familiar and reassuring.

"Gus" Shawn breathed, as a warm hand brushed his shoulder.

"It's ok Shawn, you're gonna be ok."

"Dude..." Shawn breathed again, his voice barely a whisper. His eyelids were so heavy. He would close them. Just for a minute.

"Shawn." The voice was so far away.

"_Shawn.._."

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Well that's it. Please let me know what you think, and thanks for reading.


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